religion

The Golden Rule: The Gospel and Relationships

/ Neal Embry / Leave a comment

Matthew 7:12, commonly known to as “The Golden Rule,” is one of the most famous verses in all of Scripture, and is often used by Christians and non-Christians alike.  It’s easily found on coffee mugs and posters, plastered across the American landscape.  But what does it actually mean?  What was Jesus getting at when He said it?

In case you’ve forgotten the Golden Rule and so shamed your parents and elementary school teachers, here it is:

“So whatever you wish that others would do to you, do also to them, for this is the Law and the Prophets.”

When was the last time you actually treated someone as you would want to be treated?  This morning, in traffic, did you treat the guy who cut you off like you’d want to be treated?  When your kids didn’t listen to you, and refused to obey you, did you treat them the way you’d like to be treated?  When your coworker didn’t exactly keep their promise to help out with that project that was due a week ago, did you treat them like you’d want to be treated?

We all fail to treat others as we want to be treated, because there’s a fundamental disconnect in what we think we deserve, and what we think others deserve.  Our pride would have us believe we are worthy of grace, while others are only worthy of law.  Our pride clouds our eyes from seeing our sin, but amazingly, we can see the sin of people we don’t even know!  We have good excuses, but “they” have a problem.

None of us want to be treated with the law, that is, with true justice.  We all wish for grace.  But when it comes for us to give grace, we don’t treat others the way we want to be treated.

Let’s say, for example, you cut someone off in traffic because you’re in a hurry.  We can all relate to this, and if you can’t, I’m going to assume you’re either under the age of 16, or you’re just abnormally nice behind the wheel of a car.  But, if you’re like 99% of us, you can relate to this.

When you cut someone off, and they honk their horn, is your first thought, “Oh man, that was sort of mean…I probably shouldn’t have done that.  I’ll be sure to slow down and apologize to them?”  Probably not.  Our first reaction is more along the lines of, “How dare they!  I’m late to work! I’ve got to get to (wherever you happen to be going).  They ought to drive faster!”  We want them to identify with us, to treat us with grace, or unmerited favor, when we offend them.

But if they cut us off, all you-know-what breaks loose.  “That psycho cut me off!”  “They ought to be arrested!”  When we see them pulled over half a mile later, we smile and whisper, “Justice,” even though, were we the ones to get pulled over, we’d be full of excuses, hoping, wishing, desiring that the police officer would let us off the hook, “just this once.”

Do you see the hypocrisy here?  We desire to be treated with grace.  But we don’t at all desire to treat others with grace.  Again, children are a perfect example here.  Anyone who’s ever worked with kids knows they want grace, not law.  “Please, I won’t do it again!”  “I’ll be better, I promise!”  But when their older brother twists their arm, or their sister steals their toy: “Mom/Dad…make them stop!  Ground them/put them in timeout/spank them!”  While children may grow up in a lot of ways, they’ll never grow out of their innate, sinful tendency to want to receive grace while desiring to dispense law.  At least not by their own strength.  And neither will we.

Jesus commands that we treat people with grace if that’s how we want to be treated.  We’ve established that grace is how we want to be treated, but we find it impossible to treat others with grace.  So how do we obey what Jesus says?  We have to look at what Jesus has done.  We have to see the gospel.  We have to believe the gospel.  And we have to be changed by it.

While we treat others with law, Jesus treats us with grace.  When we had sinned against Him and earned nothing but eternal hell, He left His heavenly throne to come rescue us.  When we despised Him and went after false gods, He drew us back to Himself and gave us the eyes to see and despise our sin.  When we lived for ourselves, He lived for us.  When we went after death, He died for us.  When we ran away from Him, He gave us the repentance and faith needed to come back to Him.  When we were condemned by the law, He freed us from that condemnation with His grace, at the cost of His life.

So, when we see we have no shot at saving ourselves, and we trust in Christ to be our Lord and lead us, and trust in Him as our Savior, and we receive His righteousness, and we trust and rest in His forgiveness, we are empowered, by the gospel and the power of the Holy Spirit, to show this same grace to others.

When we’re tempted to treat others the way we don’t want to be treated (law), we remember that it is by grace God has drawn us to trust in Him as our God.  We remember that God has declared us righteous, not by our law-keeping, but by Christ’s law-keeping.  We remember that it is by the blood of Christ that we are declared forgiven, and are, through faith in Christ as Lord and Savior, adopted as children of God.  We remember the grace we’ve received, and we show it to others to be more like Christ and to glorify Him.

So if you’re struggling to show grace, you need more grace.  You need more of what Jesus has done for you.  You need to rest in that, and trust in Him to help you be who you are.  And in those moments when you’re tempted to respond with law in your relationships with others, you can remember grace.  And you can be like Jesus.

Lord, may we remember that we are saved by grace.  May we treat others with that same grace.  May the gospel change us from the inside out.

God bless,

Neal E.

Note: Treating others with grace does not mean that you have to endure abuse, or that you don’t have the obligation to report a crime.  Grace destroys sin, it never enables sin.  It is not ungracious for you to separate from someone who is hurting you.  It is ungracious to not pray for that person or to desire their eternal condemnation.  It is not ungracious for you to report a crime, such as sexual assault.  It is ungracious for you to not care about innocent people who are being hurt when you can do something to stop it.  I didn’t include this in the main text, as it would take away from the main thrust of the message, but we must not think that showing grace means enabling sin.  Grace means doing what needs to be done to restore that person, and sometimes that means separating from them, or calling the police, or a private conversation that gets to the heart of the issue.  Pray to God for the eyes to see how we can show grace to everyone, even to those who hurt us.

Good Gifts from a Good Father: Matt. 7:7-11

/ Neal Embry / Leave a comment

Today, we continue the discussion of Jesus’ words in Matthew 5-7.  There’s just a few posts remaining, and I hope and pray this series has been edifying and uplifting to all who have stuck with me through it.

“Ask, and it will be given to you; seek, and you will find; knock, and it will be opened to you.  For everyone who asks receives, and the one who seeks finds, and to the one who knocks it will be opened.  Or which one of you, if his son asks him for bread, will give him a stone?  Or if he asks for a fish, will give him a serpent?  If you then, who are evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father who is in heaven give good things to those who ask him!”

Jesus commands His disciples to pray.  We’ve already discussed the Lord’s Prayer, and if we look at the life of Jesus, we see a man who, though He was God incarnate, found it absolutely necessary to break away from ministry to spend time with the Father in prayer.  So, needless to say, prayer is vital in the Christian life.

But what do we do in prayer?  Going back to the Lord’s Prayer, we can break it down to three main acts: adoration, petition and confession.  We praise God, ask God, and confess our sin to God.  In this passage, Jesus discusses the second of these acts: petition.

I don’t have children, but I have several years of experience working with children.  Among the many things I’ve learned over the years about children is this: they aren’t shy when they’re trying to get something they want.  “Please, Mr. Neal, can we play that game one more time?”  “Please don’t tell my mom I hit that kid.”  “Please, I really want more (insert favorite unhealthy snack here).”

Kids know what they want, and they’re willing to go to great lengths to get it.  I remember, like any other kid, always asking my mom for candy in the checkout line at the grocery store.  I also remember, like any other kid, the painful word, “No.”

Kids are persistent.  While they sometimes lack respect and understanding, they don’t lack for the persistent attitude Jesus describes here and in other passages (Luke 18:1-8).  Do we have this attitude in prayer?  Asking, knocking, going to the door, expecting that God will answer?  To be sure, we cannot separate this text from the rest of Scripture that commands us to pray according to God’s will (Matt. 6:10; 26:39), and this text should not be used to promote some form of the prosperity gospel that allows us to expect that if we “just have enough faith,” God will richly bless us materially.

However, we ought not run to the other extreme and throw away all forms of petition to God.  Jesus has promised that for those who trust in Him as Lord and Savior, they have now been adopted as children of God and have access to the God of the universe in prayer, and we ought to take advantage of that and ask for good gifts from a good Father.

Let’s marvel at the simple fact that we can, through faith in Christ, even talk to God, much less know Him as our Father who gives us good gifts for His glory and our joy.  We were dead, condemned sinners.  And then, 2,000 years ago, God the Father sent His Son to live perfectly in our place, to die our death on the cross, and to rise again from the grave, defeating death for all who trust in Him.  And in His glorious grace, He has given us faith to respond to the gospel, to turn away from our sin and rebellion, and to trust in Christ as Lord and Savior.  He is making us new and helping us to live out the righteousness we’ve been given.  One day, we’ll be just like Jesus, we’ll worship Him forever, and we will love Him more than we can even imagine right now.  This is the greatest gift God has given: Himself, through Jesus Christ.  If you haven’t received that gift, I urge you to consider Christ, consider what He’s done for you, and trust Him.

Jesus tells the people listening to Him that even though they are evil, they know how to give good gifts to their children.  He uses extreme analogies, such as a son asking for a fish and receiving a serpent.  His point is that while we are totally sinful and unable to save ourselves, God, in His grace, has kept us from being as evil as we could be, and one of the ways we see that is in our ability to give great gifts to our children.  Non-Christians know how to give kick-butt presents, too.  This is God’s common grace, allowing us to retain bits and pieces of the image of God we were created to reflect.

How much more then, He argues, can the Father, who is perfect, give good gifts to His children?  How much more can a good God who has redeemed us, give us what we need in order to love and obey Him?  Jesus encourages His followers to pray, not because it’s a good, religious thing to do, but because praying in faith leads to receiving good gifts from a good Father.  Pray because God longs to give you good gifts.

Praying often comes at a price.  We must quiet ourselves, lay aside everything that would keep us from communion with God, confront our sin and humble ourselves at the cross.  We must recognize that God is God, that we are not, and commit ourselves to Him.  But the reward of knowing God and receiving good gifts from Him far outweighs the price of laying aside all other things to pursue Him.

As stated before, the greatest gift we receive from God is God Himself.  But in our walking with Him in this life, God longs to bless us with good gifts.  Because God is holy, it follows that any gifts God gives will be holy.  That is, praying for God to do something or give something He has ruled unholy would be foolish.  But for those who love God and desire to love Him more and obey Him in faith, there is a world of gifts waiting for us in prayer.

Struggling with sin?  Pray to the Father for a gift of grace to kill sin and grow in holiness, becoming the man or woman God has called you to be in Christ.

Feeling like a failure in ministry, or struggling to understand God’s Word?  Your heavenly Father, who has called you to ministry, will no doubt give grace and strength to accomplish what He’s called you to do.  The author of His Word desires that all should know Him, and we can pray for understanding in faith that our Father will help us know His Word for His glory.

God blesses us with faithful friends, jobs, vacations, financial stability, etc.  God, in His common grace, blesses unbelievers with these things as well, but for the child of God, we see them not as something we’ve earned, but as an amazing gift of grace from our great God and Father, and it leads us to worship.

Take time today to reflect on all the gifts God has already given you.  Thank Him for them, and take time to consider what you need, what you most want God to grant you in your walk with Him.  And pray for it, trusting that your good, perfect, heavenly Father “will give good gifts to those who ask.”

Father, may we marvel that we can even talk to you.  May we not forget the blood of your Son that was spilled for us that we may not only be forgiven, but be adopted as your beloved children.  May we not be ashamed to ask you to give us good gifts, knowing that you long to bless us with all we need.  May we trust that you are a lot smarter than we are, much wiser and much more loving than we are, and trust you to give according to your will.  May you be glorified as we receive good gifts from you, our good and perfect Father.

God bless,

Neal E.